


If Your Plane Fell Out Of The Skies, Who Would You Call With Your Last Goodbye

by Softasamarshmallow



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Harry Styles Loves Louis Tomlinson, Harry and Louis are dumb dumbs, Hurt Louis, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Insecure Louis, Louis Tomlinson Loves Harry Styles, M/M, Makeup, OT5 Friendship, Post-breakup, but not really, damn it I have to spoil it, it's a misunderstanding, oh well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 17:33:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7901566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Softasamarshmallow/pseuds/Softasamarshmallow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"“Yeah, I’m- God- I don’t… I just- Look, I don’t have a lot of time left-”</p><p>“W-What do you mean you don’t have a lot of time left? Lou, what’s going on?” He stuttered, barely noticing the way they’d fallen back into their old counterparts as Haz and Lou, cold tendrils of fear coursing through his veins at the panic he could hear in the smaller male’s voice.</p><p>“Haz, I need to tell you that I love you.""</p><p> </p><p>Or The one where Harry and Louis have broken up, but Louis is in a plane crash, and rings Harry to say his goodbye.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If Your Plane Fell Out Of The Skies, Who Would You Call With Your Last Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this listening to "I want you here" by Plumb, and I really would suggest playing that, because it just fits this so much!
> 
> Also, Nicole has very kindly translated this fic into Russian, so RUSSIAN TRANSLATION AVAILABLE TOO at https://ficbook.net/readfic/4718202/12212284

“’Lo?” Harry mumbled into his phone, words slurred by sleep as he struggled to stay awake.

 _“H-Haz?”_ He snapped wide awake at the familiar voice, jerking upright in his bed and he clutched the phone tighter against his ear. He frowned as he glanced at the digits glaring at him from the clock on his bedside table.

“Louis? It’s four in the morning. Is everything alright?”

 _“I know- sorry about that, I just…”_ His brows furrowed further as Louis trailed off hesitantly, the brief moment of silence hanging heavily between them, punctuated by their breathing- Louis’ shallow and quick, and his own slow and deep- and vague muffled sounds coming from the other side.

He wondered where Louis was, if he was with _someone-_ which, _no,_ he wasn’t going there.

It wasn’t his place, not anymore.

_“I just wanted to talk with you.”_

“Louis, can we do this another time? I’m tired and I’d really like to be able to get some sleep before I have to face management tomorrow.” Harry sighed, pinching at the bridge of his nose tiredly, trying not to be affected even as he could feel the butterflies fluttering at the sound of that sweet, raspy voice.

_“No! Don’t hang up, please Harry. Please. Just- I just need you to listen to me, right now.”_

“What are you-”

 _“I’m sorry for fighting with you, and for yelling at you all those times, and I’m sorry that never fought for you, or kept in touch for the past few months, and most of all, I’m sorry- I’m so sorry for the breakup and hurting you, I never wanted to hurt you, and I hate myself for the fact that I did. I’m sorry for being a shit person, and an even worse partner, and for being too selfish to let you go even when I knew you deserved better. I’m sorry for a lot of other things too, I don’t know if you still even care about all that- about me- but for what it’s worth, I’m so sorry.”_ Harry straightened abruptly, the corners of his eyes creasing in worry as the other male broke off with a shuddering breath, voice cracking on the last word. He’d have thought that he was drunk, but he knew drunk Louis and _this_ definitely wasn’t it.

“What brought this on? I don’t understand- Are you… _crying?_ What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

_“Yeah, I’m- God- I don’t… I just- Look, I don’t have a lot of time left-”_

“W-What do you mean you don’t have a lot of time left? Lou, what’s going on?” He stuttered, barely noticing the way they’d fallen back into their old counterparts as _Haz_ and _Lou_ , cold tendrils of fear coursing through his veins at the panic he could hear in the smaller male’s voice.

_“Haz, I need to tell you that I love you. I still do. I don’t think I’ve ever stopped loving you, actually, and I don’t think I ever will, and I just wanted you to know that, because you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I love you so much, and I know I didn’t tell you that enough and I should have, because it’s never going to be enough- I’m sorry for that too, and especially for not telling you when I still could have-”_

 “Lou, please, you’re scaring me babe, what’s happening?” He pleaded desperately, heart pounding furiously in his chest at the _regret,_ the _finality_ with which those words were spoken, because this sounded like- but it couldn’t be, no, not _Louis._

_“It’s- fuck- we’re going down and I can’t-…”_

“I don’t-” Harry starts, words cut off by a sudden whoosh of air on the other side, followed closely by loud rattling and shrill screams piercing the air.

“What was that?” He demanded, voice tinged with urgency because he knew- just _knew_.

“Lou… Lou, where are you?”

_“I… I’m on a plane, Haz.”_

“You’re on a plane. _”_ He repeated in shock, mind stuttering as he tried to comprehend the weight of Louis’ admission. His legs crumbled weakly beneath him, sending him slumping back down onto his bed, blood drained from his face as he pressed a hand over his mouth.

“Oh _God.”_

_We’re going down._

_“Yeah.”_ Louis breathed out in a watery laugh, the sound sad and broken. Harry let out a small whimper, hot tears streaming down his cheeks because this wasn’t _fair,_ wasn’t how he’d imagined the first time they reconnected to be in such circumstances.

He wanted to scream at Louis, at the world, at anyone who would listen, wanted to scream _whataboutmewhataboutmewhataboutme,_ and _You can’t leave me,_ and _I still need you with me- I always need you with me._

He wanted to tell him that he loved him- always did, always will.

“I love you.”

“ _W-What?”_

“I love you, Lou. Never stopped and never will. I wish- _God,_ I love you so much too, and I want you to know that too. You’re the greatest, the loveliest, the most precious I’ve ever had, and the one and only love of my life. You’re the light in my darkest times, the compass to my ship, the rope to my anchor, and I don’t- what am I supposed to do without you, Lou?” He choked out, despair clawing at his chest, painting his words, breaths hitched with wrecked sobs.

_“I’m sorry, baby, I’m so, so sorry. I hate that I’m doing this to you, and I wish that I’d reunited with you when I had the chance to, and not- But listen, Haz, promise me that you’ll-”_

“No.”

_“Harry.”_

“I won’t, you can’t. You can’t do this to me- Please don’t do this to me, don’t make me promise you _that_ , I _can’t.”_

_“…Okay, okay, I won’t, baby. I won’t, just breathe, Haz.”_

“You’re my soul mate, Lou. You’re it for me; I’m not- I don’t want to move on to anyone else. So you _can’t_ ask me for that _,_ okay?”

 _“You’re it for me too, Haz. God, I love you so much, never doubt that. I love y-”_ He’s cut off by a loud bang, static crackling heavily over the line before fading into a deafening silence.

“Lou?” Harry choked out between strangled breaths, voice small and timid, praying for the other male to speak up, to assure him, to- _just something_ \- even though he _knew_.

His prayers were answered only with a click and a prolonged beep, the signaled end of their conversation bringing an overwhelming darkness as his vision suddenly swam and dimmed.

_He’s gone…_

~

Harry jolted awake, chest heaving as he panted breathlessly, mind whirring as it fell back on Louis.

_Oh God, Louis._

He scrambled for his phone, frantically punching in Louis’ number, heart racing as he impatiently waited for someone to answer.

_Come on, Lou._

_“Hi, you’ve reached my voicemail- this is Louis, by the way- sorry I’m not here to take your call right now, but feel free to leave a message after the nice lady tells you so.”_

He flung himself out of bed, scurrying to locate his misplaced notebook- he needed to check, needed to know if it was all just a nightmare, needed to know that Louis was _safe_ \- nearly sobbing when he realized that he had no other information about the flight that the other male was on.

He didn’t know anything about him, not anymore, just that he was in Los Angeles. He remembered seeing a tweet on that, a photo attached of him and a couple of his mates, arm slung around Zayn’s shoulders. He remembered the jealousy that gripped him as he glared at the photo, wishing he’d been there- he should have been the one Louis was hanging off, not-

_Zayn._

_“Mm?”_

“Zayn- Thank God-” Harry greeted hurriedly, fumbling as he tried to gather his frazzled thoughts enough to form a coherent statement.

_“Harry? What time is it? Is everything okay?”_

“No, look, listen Zayn, is Lou with you? Please tell me he is.”

_“Wha- Lou? No, I haven’t spoken with him since I dropped him off at the airport yesterday. What’s this about? Why are you even looking for him at like arse o’ clock in the morning, because if this is about the breakup, I swear, Styles-”_

_I’m on a plane, Haz._

“Zayn. Zayn, I think… I think Lou’s plane crashed.” He breathed out in a hushed whisper, as if afraid to break the bubble of silence that had surrounded him following Zayn’s answer; as if he could prevent this from being the truth if he could just protect the fragility of this silence.

Because he _was_ afraid, so very _afraid_.

 _“Wait what? That’s not funny, Harry.”_ Zayn snapped, words laced with an underlying terror even as he maintained his disbelief and denial.

“I’m not joking, _God_ , I wish I was Zayn- he, Lou rang me to say-” He cut off with a sob, words coming out warbled from panic as he pressed his palms hard into his eyes.

“And then the line got cut and I tried ringing him back but no one’s answering and, I don’t- I don’t know what to do.”

 _“Okay, okay, umm just- give me one second to check the news or something, just breathe, H. I’ll- Oh my God.”_ Harry sobbed at that, hearing the confirmation of his very worst nightmare in the shock of Zayn’s floundering words.

_“I- fuck, I’m going to catch the next flight out. I’ll tell Liam and Niall to come over to yours, okay? You shouldn’t be alone right now, and they should know too, and- I’ll be right there, H.”_

“Okay, thanks Z.”

_“See you, H. Just hang in there.”_

~

“M-Mum…”

_“Harry? What’s wrong, baby? What’s happened?”_

“M-Mum, Lou- Lou, he-”

_“What? Harry, what happened to Louis? Is he hurt?”_

“I- I don’t _know_. H-He rang me just now, he- he said th-that his plane was going down. _Mum_ , _his plane crashed._ I can’t lose him, Mum, I _can’t.”_

_“Oh my God. Are you sure Harry?”_

“Yeah, we- Zayn checked and it’s his plane.”

_“I’m coming to you, baby, are you alone now?”_

“Y-you don’t have to, Mum. L-Liam and Niall a-are on their way t-too, I just- I’m _terrified_.”

“ _I know baby, we’ll be there as soon as we can, okay? Louis’ a part of our family too, we need to be there.”_

~

Harry sighed, collapsing onto the plush cushions of his couch as he dragged his palms roughly over his face, fingers knotting into his stressed curls, hoping- _praying_ \- for the countless time that night that he’d just… _something_.

“It’ll be alright, H… No news is good news too.” Niall whispered, hand smoothing gently over the tensed ridges of Harry’s back as he exhaled heavily and jerked his head in a nod.

The boys had come over soon after Zayn’d ended the call, stumbling over themselves in their anxiety as they burst through his doors, panic evident in their voices as they threw question upon question at him. It’d been hours since then; hours since Harry had explained, had nearly broken down into wretched weeping again as he recalled Louis’ goodbye- because that was what it’d been wasn’t it, a _goodbye;_ hours since Liam had switched on the news and they’d listened as the reporter announced that they were starting the search and rescue, that they’d found _survivors_.

They quieted slightly at that, faces still etched with stress and worry, but lined with _hope_ , because they knew Louis and Louis was stubborn- a trait that they’d all simultaneously struggled with and admired often, but were definitely grateful for now, because that made him a _fighter,_ a _survivor._

If anyone could survive this, even just on pure willpower alone, it would be Louis.

“What if… He’s alright, isn’t he, Mum? He has to be.” Harry muttered quietly, looking up to his mum with saddened eyes as she sighed sympathetically and pressed a chaste kiss to his curls.

“I’m sure he is, love. This is Louis we’re talking about after all, he’s strong.”

“I just- what if he’s not, because I _need_ him and I haven’t told him that; I need to tell him that I love him, because I do, and I don’t tell him that enough, and what if-” Anne shushed him as his breathing faltered, holding him tighter, murmuring soft assurances to him.

“Hush. He knows you do, and he loves you back. You just have to keep believing in him.”

Harry sighed again, letting himself be pulled backwards into her arms, Gemma bracketing him on the other side, relishing the small comfort it brought. He hated this- the sitting around, the pacing, the silence, the worry; he hated not being able to go on scene to help find his boy, hated the not _knowing_.

He just wanted Louis back.

It wasn’t the first time he did; it’d been on his mind constantly since their break up, but he’d just wanted Louis to give in.

He’d wanted Louis to just _stop_ being so _stubborn for once_ and give in; even though he knew that Louis _was_ giving, in his own little way, especially when it came to Harry, and he’d known that, but- it was stupid, the fight, and the subsequent breakup.

They’d been rowing about something- Harry didn’t even remember what it was- but just something _insignificant,_ because they were _exhausted_ and run down by the fame and management and being apart. All they’d really wanted was to fall together and forget about the world, but they _didn’t_ and took it out on the other instead, because they were so _painfully_ , _desperately in love_ , but being in love _hurt_ and they just wanted some _peace_.

So they’d broken up.

And it was so stupid, the way they’d refused to see each other, to be in the same places, to apologize and make up. It was stupid, the way Harry refused to apologize, not till Louis did, even though he’d so longed for the other male during all those cold, sleepless nights. It was stupid, because he’d known that for all that Louis pretended to be, he was also so very insecure and probably was _afraid_ to face the possible rejection (as if Harry could reject him) if he had apologized. It was stupid, because he’d missed Louis, and because after all that, he was still _so foolishly in love_ with him.

It was stupid, because he’d known that Louis was feeling the same way.

But _God_ , if he’d known this would be happening, he’d have happily groveled at his feet and begged him to take him back; would have gladly accepted his stubbornness, his insecurities, and loved him for them all the same (not that he didn’t anyway, but it wasn’t enough, would _never_ be _enough)_ ; would have kissed the ground he walked on, even, just to have Louis _by his side_ , _safe_ and _protected_.

~

He doesn’t remember how it happened; one second he was pacing, hands shaking from the potent combination of fear and worry with each passing hour, minute, second (and deep beneath it all, the unrelenting spark of hope that maybe, _maybe)_ , and the next, Zayn was gripping him hard on both shoulders and screaming ecstatically at him that _they’ve found him_ and _he’s alive_ and suddenly, he’s being swept out into a car and sped down the street to the hospital, Liam yelling profanities at the other drivers the whole way there as Niall clutched at his fingers in a death grip.

He vaguely remembers Zayn explaining in the car, something about how the hospital staff had rung Jay when they couldn’t reach Harry, who was listed as Louis’ emergency contact, who then rang him and it didn’t _matter_ , none of it did, because _Louis was alive._  

He remembers taking off as soon as he’d heard the ward number Louis was in, ignoring the reprimanding yells behind him about how there was no running in the hospital, heart pounding in time to the mantra of _LouisLouisLouisLouisLouis_ racing through his mind.

He remembers how he’d skidded to a halt by the door of the ward, freezing as he took in the sight of a rumpled, bruised caramel haired boy- _his_ boy- looking so tiny and vulnerable in bed, tanned skin a stark contrast to the white sheets. He remembers how he could do nothing but stare, forest green meeting sky blue, mind still unable to believe that _he_ was really _here._

It’s not till a broken _Haz_ falls from those lips that he finally processes it.

_Louis is alive._

“Oh my God. You’re alive.” Harry breathed, surging the last few steps and dropping to his knees by Louis’ side, arms thrown haphazardly around him. He buried his face into the scratchy fabric of the hospital gown by Louis’ stomach, taking a shuddering breath as he felt _familiar_ lithe fingers combing through his hair, pressing him closer.

 “I am, H, I’m okay. We’re okay.”

“I was _so scared_ , Lou, I- you can’t do that to me again, Lou. I can’t go through that, I can’t lose you again, Lou, never again.”

“I’m here. I’m sorry for putting you through that, fuck, I’m so sorry, baby.” Louis murmured, voice cracking as he sniffled, face shoved into the familiar thick mop of curls that he’d missed endlessly in the time they’d been apart.

It wasn’t till much later, when the room had cleared of all other visitors- not that they had acknowledged anyone else, wrapped up as they were in each other, breathing in the comforting scent of the other and murmuring constant soft assurances and sweet words- that Louis finally pulled away slightly to take a proper look at his boy, nosing at his cheek gently till he could see those beautiful emerald eyes.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“I love you.”

 “I love you too. You’re not leaving my side ever again. I’m going to keep you with me, forever.”

“Forever?”

“Forever.”

“Sounds perfect, Haz.”

**Author's Note:**

> Soooooo I'm back with another story!!! SURPRISE! 
> 
> I'm surprised by myself to be honest, since I'd just posted that other long one... but this idea came into my head, sort of prompted by the episode in Psych that I was watching in which he asked his dad what he'd tell him if his plane was crashing and he only had 15 seconds left.
> 
> Can I just say how much research I had to do on eye colours for the boys, like. That shade!!!! Apparently Emerald and Sapphire (both of which I used and changed because it didn't match anyways) are both cliched and improbable for human eyes... actually I left Harry's eyes as Emerald like once I think, but like, HAVE YOU SEEN HIS EYES? 
> 
> This has not been beta'd, though I've tried to proofread it a few times... but I don't think that's much help 'cause my brain is a bit jumbled these days. Also not brit picked!
> 
> Please kudos, leave a comment, feedback, prompt... whatever you'd like <3


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